I wrote recently about removing the word "easy" from our vocabulary. The next word I would like to see removed is "complaining", and be replaced by "paining".
People complain mostly to friends and family that something in their life isn't going well...which means it isn't going the way they would like it to go...that they have to do things they don't want to do, that others have it easier in life, that life is not fair and "I don't deserve this". Morning to night, day to day, the complaining goes on, spreading like a creeping fog to everything in one's life, captured in the ultimate moan, "life sucks". Complaining quickly becomes, not an expression of sadness over a misfortune, but a way of thinking, a way of life.
Problem is, complaining, as a rule, solves nothing. In fact, the complaining does the reverse. It magnifies the misfortune in the mind of the complainer, generating more unhappiness, it tends to push away those who might be in a position to advise, comfort and help, and perhaps worst of all, it inhibits the action that could help the complainer solve, overcome, or adjust to, the perceived, real or imaginary, misfortune. In other words, it is anti the enjoyment of life.
Why do so many complain so much, despite the many bounties of life? My guess is they likely don't have the confidence in themselves to make their lives better, despite the occasional misfortunes that befall us all. Complaining is, I believe, often a cry of surrender. And often, a needless one.
"Paining" is the far more appropriate and descriptive word to express what complainers do. Want advice, a suggestion, a hope? I'm your man. But "complaining" is not in my game.
Nor are "moaning", "groaning", "griping", "grouching", "squawking", "bellyaching" and "bitching".
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